Thursday, May 31, 2007
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Quote for Today
Good judgement comes from experience, and often experience comes from bad judgement.
Rita Mae Brown
Rita Mae Brown
Fact for Today
The brewing trade in the United Kingdom reached the
maximum production of 37,090,986 barrels in 1900.
maximum production of 37,090,986 barrels in 1900.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Fact for Today
When a mania of persecution swept over Massachusetts in 1692, eighteen people were hanged, one was pressed to death, many suffered imprisonment, and two died in jail.
Quote for Today
"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice president, and that one word is 'to be prepared.'"
Vice President Al Gore, 12/6/93
Vice President Al Gore, 12/6/93
Monday, May 28, 2007
Fact for Today
Benjamin Franklin recorded in 1771 that America had twenty-five
newspapers. Boston led with five. Philadelphia had three:
newspapers. Boston led with five. Philadelphia had three:
Quote for Today
It's not that I'm so smart , it's just that I stay with problems longer.
Albert Einstein
Albert Einstein
Sunday, May 27, 2007
Fact for Today
Andrew Jackson was the only president of the United States to marry the same woman twice.
Saturday, May 26, 2007
Quote for Today
'Tis better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than open one's mouth and remove all doubt.
Samuel Johnson
Samuel Johnson
Fact For Today
Friday, May 25, 2007
Country Facts
China:
Capital: Beijing
Population: approx: 1,313,973,000
Area: in sq. km. 9,596,960
Country code: cn
Capital: Beijing
Population: approx: 1,313,973,000
Area: in sq. km. 9,596,960
Country code: cn
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Fact for Today
Twelve pounds of nitrogen per acre falls on the earth each year as a result of lightning.
Quote for Today
A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.
Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill
Joke for Today
The madam of a brothel has a problem, so she goes to a local priest. "I have two talking female parrots," she tells him. "All they can say is ‘Hi, we’re prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?’"
"That’s awful," the priest agrees, "but I have a solution to your problem. I have two male parrots whom I’ve taught to pray and read the Bible. If we put your parrots with mine, I believe yours will stop saying that awful phrase and will instead learn to recite the word of God."
The next day, the madam brings her parrots to the priest’s house and puts them in with the male parrots, who are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage.
"Hi, we’re prostitutes." say the females. "Do you want to have some fun?"
One male parrot looks at the other and squawks, "Close the Bible, Frank! Our prayers are answered!"
"That’s awful," the priest agrees, "but I have a solution to your problem. I have two male parrots whom I’ve taught to pray and read the Bible. If we put your parrots with mine, I believe yours will stop saying that awful phrase and will instead learn to recite the word of God."
The next day, the madam brings her parrots to the priest’s house and puts them in with the male parrots, who are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage.
"Hi, we’re prostitutes." say the females. "Do you want to have some fun?"
One male parrot looks at the other and squawks, "Close the Bible, Frank! Our prayers are answered!"
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Joke for Today
Neighbour:_ "I hear that you had an actor employed on your farm."
Farmer:_ "Yes, and he's a fairly good actor, too. Why, I thought he was
working the whole week he was here."
Farmer:_ "Yes, and he's a fairly good actor, too. Why, I thought he was
working the whole week he was here."
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Life-saving Fact
Two recent graduates of Hamilton’s McMaster University who invented a live-saving glove have been recognized by Popular Science magazine. The glove they invented will be honoured as one of this years top 10 inventions and will be featured in June’s issue of Popular Science.
The glove is a one size fits all nylon glove filled with sensors which monitor compressions administered during C.P.R. The sensors register the frequency and depth of those compressions which are then shown on a display for the user to see.
After learning that most people forget C.P.R. training after six months, the students came up with the life-saving glove idea.
The glove is a one size fits all nylon glove filled with sensors which monitor compressions administered during C.P.R. The sensors register the frequency and depth of those compressions which are then shown on a display for the user to see.
After learning that most people forget C.P.R. training after six months, the students came up with the life-saving glove idea.
Monday, May 21, 2007
More Quotes
The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools.
Doug Larson
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
- Will Rogers
To prophesy is extremely difficult - especially with regard to the future.
- Chinese proverb
The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.
- George Bernard Shaw
The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools.
Doug Larson
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
- Will Rogers
To prophesy is extremely difficult - especially with regard to the future.
- Chinese proverb
The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.
- George Bernard Shaw
Today's Joke
A man walks up to his house and notices his grandfather sitting on the porch, in the rocking chair, with nothing on from the waist down.
“Grandpa, what are you doing?” he exclaims. The old man looks off in the distance without answering. “Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here with nothing on below the waist?” he asks again.
The old man slowly looks at him and says, “Well, last week I sat out here with no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck. This is your grandma’s idea.”
“Grandpa, what are you doing?” he exclaims. The old man looks off in the distance without answering. “Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here with nothing on below the waist?” he asks again.
The old man slowly looks at him and says, “Well, last week I sat out here with no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck. This is your grandma’s idea.”
Friday, May 18, 2007
Jokes
If a man is talking in the woods and no woman hears him…is he still wrong?
An old Newfoundlander walks into a bar, hauls his bad leg over the stool, and asks for a whiskey. "Hey," he says, looking down the bar, "is that Jesus down there?" The bartender nods, so the Newfoundlander orders Jesus one too.
An ailing Quebecer with a humpback walks in, shuffles up to the bar, and asks for a glass of wine. Noticing Jesus, the Quebecer orders Him a glass of wine too.
A Cape Bretoner swaggers in and hollers, "Barkeep, set me up a cold one! Hey—is that God’s Boy down there?" The bartender nods, so the Cape Bretoner orders Him a bottle of beer.
As Jesus gets up to leave, He touches the Newfoundlander and says, "For your kindness, you are healed!" The Newfoundlander jumps up and dances a jig.
Then Jesus touches the Quebecer and says, "For your kindness, you are healed!" The Quebecer's humpback straightens, and he does a flip.
Just then the Cape Bretoner yells out, "Don’t touch me! I’m drawing disability!"
One day, three boys were walking over a bridge when they heard a guy yelling for help. It was President Bush. He was drowning, and the three boys rescued him. He thanked them dearly and promised them whatever they wanted as a reward.
The first boy wanted $10,000, so Bush gave him the money. The second boy wanted a Ferrari, so Bush gave the boy a Ferrari.
The third boy wanted a wheelchair, Bush said, “Why do you want one of those, son, you're not handicapped.” The boy replied, “I will be when my dad finds out whose life I saved.”
An old Newfoundlander walks into a bar, hauls his bad leg over the stool, and asks for a whiskey. "Hey," he says, looking down the bar, "is that Jesus down there?" The bartender nods, so the Newfoundlander orders Jesus one too.
An ailing Quebecer with a humpback walks in, shuffles up to the bar, and asks for a glass of wine. Noticing Jesus, the Quebecer orders Him a glass of wine too.
A Cape Bretoner swaggers in and hollers, "Barkeep, set me up a cold one! Hey—is that God’s Boy down there?" The bartender nods, so the Cape Bretoner orders Him a bottle of beer.
As Jesus gets up to leave, He touches the Newfoundlander and says, "For your kindness, you are healed!" The Newfoundlander jumps up and dances a jig.
Then Jesus touches the Quebecer and says, "For your kindness, you are healed!" The Quebecer's humpback straightens, and he does a flip.
Just then the Cape Bretoner yells out, "Don’t touch me! I’m drawing disability!"
One day, three boys were walking over a bridge when they heard a guy yelling for help. It was President Bush. He was drowning, and the three boys rescued him. He thanked them dearly and promised them whatever they wanted as a reward.
The first boy wanted $10,000, so Bush gave him the money. The second boy wanted a Ferrari, so Bush gave the boy a Ferrari.
The third boy wanted a wheelchair, Bush said, “Why do you want one of those, son, you're not handicapped.” The boy replied, “I will be when my dad finds out whose life I saved.”
Quotes On Golf
"If a lot of people gripped a knife like they do a golf club, they would starve to death."
Sam Snead, American professional golfer
"Show me a man who is a good loser and I'll show you a man who is playing golf with his boss."
Anonymous
"Golf is not a funeral, although both can be very sad affairs."
Bernard Darwin (1876-1961), British Columnist
"The most advanced medical brains in the universe have yet to discover a way for a man to relax himself, and looking at a golf ball is not the cure."
American writer Milton Gross (1912-1973)
"If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game would be played far better than it is.
Horace Hutchinson from Hints on the Game of Golf - 1886.
Sam Snead, American professional golfer
"Show me a man who is a good loser and I'll show you a man who is playing golf with his boss."
Anonymous
"Golf is not a funeral, although both can be very sad affairs."
Bernard Darwin (1876-1961), British Columnist
"The most advanced medical brains in the universe have yet to discover a way for a man to relax himself, and looking at a golf ball is not the cure."
American writer Milton Gross (1912-1973)
"If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game would be played far better than it is.
Horace Hutchinson from Hints on the Game of Golf - 1886.
N.Y.S.E. Facts
On March 8, 1817 the New York Stock Exchange adopted a constitution and the name of "New York Stock & Exchange Board".
March 16, 1830 Dullest day in history of Stock Exchange. Thirty-one shares of stock were traded in: 26 shares of United States Bank at 119 and 5 shares of Morris Canal and Banking Co. at 75 1/4. (From The New York Stock Exchange, by E. Clarence Stedman.)
March 16, 1830 Dullest day in history of Stock Exchange. Thirty-one shares of stock were traded in: 26 shares of United States Bank at 119 and 5 shares of Morris Canal and Banking Co. at 75 1/4. (From The New York Stock Exchange, by E. Clarence Stedman.)
Thursday, May 17, 2007
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